God's Love Shines down on us all

God's Love Shines down on us all
I Love You All, Blessed Be

Friday, September 11, 2009

Unintentionally causing fear and hurting myself with my writings

Hello world. Again if your reading this I would appreciate you going to the networkedblogs website and becoming a follower of my blogs. It gives me more support than you know. I read a comment on my Facebook page about one of my blog postings this morning and it upset me so I've decided to share it with you, plus my response so that more people can learn better understanding. Thanks, and I love you all!

HE'S BACK!!!!!!!!! Are you scared yet? heh heh :)
Yes friends and fans, he's back and better than ever! He's new and improved! He's got that little something extra! It's called the RIGHT medication, at least for now. Any change or meltdown and I've got people that will back ...me up and get me back on track. I would like to thank EVERYONE for their...

Yesterday at 1:43am · Comment · / · Share it · Tweet it · Follow blog

Scott Crawley
Anyone dealing with autism in any way, shape or form must read this post. It is an absolute necessity! I love you all :)
Yesterday at 1:44am · Delete

Parker Horne
This is kind of scary!!! I have been reading your blogs and some of it is very interesting but a lot of it makes me wonder if they should of let you out. No offense but its kind of scary to think that your meds could go wrong again and this time something terrible could happen, Your Daughter is beautiful I'm sorry to hear about all the problems ... Read Moreyour children are having and the school stuff isnt just with autistic children its with all children. I dont think the schools give a hoot about our children all they care about is their paychecks. My son has adhd and the school cant even handle that.
Yesterday at 10:35pm

Scott Crawley
Parker, rest assured that I am scared about another meltdown too, but rest assured when I wrote this post, I was in the right frame of mind. Right now the meds they've got me on are working and I am feeling better. I do need an anti-anxiety med and I have requested it from the psychs. I don't want to scare or harm ANYONE. My whole life the only person I've tried to be mean to is ME. I care so much about other peoples feelings that it hurts me severely when I cause them any kind of emotional distress. But again with this posting I was just trying to get people in the autistic community fired up to get our community noticed and get more taken care of because Aspergers/Autism is a VERY serious condition and more normal people need to be aware that we not only need help from the doctors, psychs, and schools, but normal society also needs to know how bad they can hurt us and send us spiraling down into depression, anxiety, and even suicidal tendencies. We need to be handled with kid gloves, we need to be treated with extra compassion, caring, and love. No one that suffers from autism asked to be the way we are and we all have an incredibly deep longing to be normal and to be accepted. The sad truth is we are never going to be and at the end of the day it is still us alone in our own minds trying to get a grasp on and understand not only normal peoples reactions to us, but the mistakes that we've made trying to relate to them socially. I apologize if I scared you or harmed you in any way. This is not my intention, it is just part of my Aspergers. This last time I was in the hospital I was glad to be there. I knew that I HAD to be there, and I was just centimeters away from ending my own life with my daughters insulin. I want to be on the meds. I desire all of the help and support, and acceptance from anyone that I feel I deserve just like any other human being does. And yes I agree, the schools aren't doing enough for any children, normal or otherwise, but you have to understand that at least down here in Louisiana their attitude is that these special kids need to be mainstreamed and that will help them become a normal person. These kids will NEVER be normal. They will ALWAYS, be the way they are just like I have always been an Aspergian. I learned for the most part how to fit in and be accepted even if I was hiding in a corner in a room full of people. I did the best I could but I've always had these issues to deal with and no matter what kind of progress I made in school or how many friends/acquaintances I had, it never fixed my autism. The schools down here have no people trained to deal with autistic kids and their meltdowns. They don't even realize how harmful a meltdown is to the kid that is having it. I am still suffering from all kinds of fears and emotions and PAIN from my last meltdown. I am INCREDIBLY embarrassed, withdrawn, full of fear and anxiety, I feel like a freak, I have MILLIONS of thoughts running through my head about why I am the way I am, about how many people I affected and hurt with my writings, about how they perceive me, and many many others. Again with this particular post I was just trying to get the action started that I feel the autistic community NEEDS to happen to cause a change, to open the worlds eyes, and to finally gain some acceptance and understanding. Your friend always

1 comment:

  1. Scott, you can't let idiots like Parker get you down. He has NO concept of what aspies and auties go through.. he has no compassion and I feel for his child. something terrible could happen to his kid with or without meds..he should encourage you and compliment you on TRYINg to be more outgoing and dealing with all the issues you have to deal with. I am the mother to twin sons 20 yrs old with aspergers.. ADHD would be a cakewalk compared to aspergers and autism.. Hang in there, continue to GROW and educate the public about your struggles and accomplishments. God Bless you and Keep you, Scott. brush the negative comments off your shoulders like dandruff..